Not a Good Performance; Moving On

Added on by PS Cat02.

Hi everybody.

It's a good thing March has 31 days in it, otherwise I would have had no entries this month. We finally finished our first video episode yesterday, and while we're quite happy to get number one out of the way, making that episode was also a pretty stressful process. I suspect we're going to run into quite a bit of problems for a while, being that I'm not going to be able to fix many of the problems we encountered any time soon. First off, we found out right away that I'm not a good performer. Talking with your friends is sure a lot different from talking with a microphone and camera in front of you and having that little red recording light flashing. I'm learning all kinds of things I didn't really want to know about myself: I tend to slur a lot of words together. I tend to trail off at the ends of sentences. I mispronounce a lot of words. When I'm reading my script, it really sounds like I'm reading from a script. And it's almost as if the harder I try, the worse everything gets. Plus, I really don't like the sound of my voice… I think I need voice lessons, acting lessons, and a whole bunch of other lessons I've never even heard of yet. I'm sure it's just going to take a lot of practicing on my part to get better, and it's actually really nerve-wracking to think that there's people out there listening as I'm floundering around in front of a microphone. My ego's all slumped over and tired from the mean ass-kicking it received this week.

But Bunny, Mimi, Kim, and I, we've been talking about it a lot these past few weeks, and we keep on coming to the same conclusion - it's important to keep working. We'll keep trying to improve as we go along, but for the time being, we just feel like we have to be stubborn and single-minded and force our way forward. We read the newspapers every day and sometimes we just feel so overwhelmed, almost like there's nothing we can do to make anything better. We probably won't know for a while if anybody will find The Pinky Show useful in some way or not, but one thing we've definitely found out for ourselves already, is that in order to make The Pinky Show, we have to talk a lot things out. And all this talking and discussion is helping us to kind of sort out our thoughts and think through some of the things that's been pressing down on us. An other option would be for us to lie around and spend all our time complaining and whining about stuff - I'm pretty sure that kind of behavior accomplishes absolutely nothing. Cats don't live a long time you know, we're here in this world for a little while and then we're gone. We don't have much time to waste.